Comeuppance

Remember at Leland Kermesse I mentioned how I had noticed a Cat 4 illegally drafting the Cat 3 chase group for half the race, even though he was told several times not to? He drafted his way to 5th place in a horrendously hard race while other folks busted their ass just to finish with pride and honesty.

Well, the same guy was up to more shenanigans last weekend at the ABD masters crit weekend. He sprinted his way to top 4 placings on Saturday and Sunday in the 40+4s, winning $20 on Sunday and with good chances of winning the weekend overall and the $100 that goes with it. One mistake though, he seemed to have forgotten that his age is revealed on his team website and on USACycling - he ain't 40. Big mistake.

He must have ticked off more than me because at the start of the 40+/4 race on Monday they made an announcement that a racer was DQ'd from all 3 weekend races and was being forced to hand back his prizemoney - someone else had cottoned on to his nonsense and informed the officials. Congrats to ABR for taking decisive action. If it's possible, I hope he gets his USAcycling license suspended as well. Just once, a cheat gets exposed. The irony is, the guy's a strong allaround rider with a good sprint, shouldn't need to cheat to do well.

The same weekend, that team's manager was warned 3 times, and fined, for misbehavior at the Duluth Stage Race.

Snake Alley Crit

Cat 4/12 laps/65 starters/39 finishers

Still recovering from the wreck of 6 weeks ago, training plenty but unable to do any intensity without my legs locking up. One would think that Snake Alley is the worst possible race to do, and one would be right - however I had already paid my money and wanted to experience the most famous crit in the midwest just once.

Not a lot to say about this except that it showcased my two biggest weaknesses, accelerations and downhill cornering. Nothing can prepare you for the shock to the system that is the opening two laps of this race. I went from a good starting position to halfway when we hit the snake, to two thirds of the way back by the time we hit the top. I thought I had decent strength but guys I can usually beat easily in cross were rocketing past me as I hit my max power for the 30 secs up the hill. Same story on lap 2 where i fell even further behind. The hill was dog rough and I was having some problems with my front wheel lifting - plenty of shoulder bumping which I always enjoy.

Laps 3 and 4 I found some better lines, rode the Snake much smoother and started to get the hang of the corners. People were starting to blow up already and I was beginning to pick off and pass people. My slowtwitch diesel engine self was now coming out to play and I was optimistic about moving up for the rest of the race.

Then I got pulled.

I pulled over and waited for the leaders to come through - which they did, quite a while later.
The pace had slowed up considerably after the insanity of the first two laps - a lead group of 4 or so, chase group of six and second chase group of about 10. All separated by 10-15 seconds. Everybody too exhausted to attack and just trying to save themselves for the hill.

That was how it played out until the the last lap. Nothing much happened until the pace increased for the final dash. Skinny-ass teens came first and second, older geezer came third. So goes it.

What I took from the race - My trips up the hill were probably the most intense experiences I have had on a bike, that is something I will remember forever. The corners weren't as bad as I had expected and I need to work on this over the summer. Don't know what I can do about the start - my sprint power is close to untrained level and I have had very little success in trying to change it. I think I was one of the last to be pulled, so if I can just corner with more confidence I should at least be able to finish the race.

Not sure why the officials pulled so aggressively in some races and allowed folks to get lapped in other races and impede others. I'm all in favor of doing what it takes to ensure safety, but it's usual to give riders a chance and pull them when it's clear that they are just about to be lapped. Even at my slowest, it would have take 3 or 4 more laps for me to be caught, and, given the marked slowing of the pace, I think I even stood a fair chance of finishing unlapped. Pulling so early for merely being out of contention is disappointing. Such is life.

Stayed on and showed my support for the rest of the races and spent quite a while noting the cornering techniques of the good guys. Tilford is a master.

The rest of the weekend was unremarkable. I decided there was no point in doing the quad cities crit because the 14 lap race lasts 22 minutes and I wouldn't even be warmed up at that stage. Drove up there to spectate anyway and enjoyed it. Highlight of the day was getting passed on I-80 by a Smart car doing over 90 mph - in the middle of a torrential shower, with traffic cops every five miles. Someone's got cojones! Second-best part was seeing Steve Tilford take the bunch sprint for 3rd place. How a skinny 49 year old with no noticeable upper or lower body can beat out some of the musclebound midwest sprinting divas is a mystery to me - I guess Steve knows how to work them over.

193 Wins

193 top professional wins in these legs. 18 years pro racing, nine Monuments, one Grand Tour

Finchford Roubaix

Seven laps of a 5.5 mile rectangular circuit. Some small hills and a deceptively fast downhill corner that sent several 3s and 12s into the ditch. Wouldn't have been a challenging course if it wasn't for the brutal 20+ mph crosswind - that made it a grinding race of attrition.

They sure breed 'em big in Iowa. I felt that I had the smallest legs in the race - and I'm no midget. I noted a couple of wobbly riders to avoid, and sure enough, the most unsteady guy was the one who violated the yellow line multiple times in the crosswind.

Been 5 weeks since my Hillsboro crash and I'm still recovering. Put in plenty of time on the bike but haven't been able to do any intensity - it showed. Started yo-yoing off the back on the 2nd lap, 3 hours sleep and 4.5 hours driving had me cornering even worse than usual. Got popped at the end of lap 3, joined up with another popped rider and rotated until we got caught by two more. Did some good echeloning for 3 laps and caught nearly a dozen stragglers on the last lap, but had no idea what cat they were in, bib #s were in order of registration and had no bearing on the race category.

One guy bridged off the front on the last lap, we were all hurting and couldn't follow. Iit looks like I won the sprint (50 yard dash) out of our four man chase group. Didn't see any actual line so I was just guessing about the exact finish.

Enough about me; I finished (Sean would have) - quite a few didn't. The real story is the superb grassroots race Finchford Roubaix turned out to be. Only $20 entry fee, generous lunch provided (saving at least $10) and very respectable payout put many larger events to shame. Best thing was the large number of volunteers and the considerable emphasis on safety throughout. At least 3 volunteers coordinating each corner, stopping traffic so that anyone swinging out wide would not be in danger and keeping any inconvenienced drivers in good humor. Not fun to stay out there in the howling wind for a full day, but very much appreciated. This race deserves a lot more support and I'm already putting the word out for next year. Grassroots racing as it should be.

Here's a more interesting report.

Dangerous Dan Hill takes the W
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Call him what you like - known variously as Dangerous Dan Hill, Desperate Dan, EvilDan, Daddy to his kids, Honeybunny to his wife and Wheelsucker to his teammates - Dangerous Dan came to Iowa's Finchford Roubaix road race with the sole intention of adding to the number of illustrious wins that Proctor Cycling has been picking up this season.

Despite the impediment of six fingers on his left hand, Dan still has plenty of space to count up the uphill sprints he has lost in the past few years; and he wasn't interested in adding to the number.

Six laps of a 20+mph crosswind-ravaged four-corner course lay between Dan and destiny. It would require a masterclass in wheelsucking and shelter-seeking; and the master was up to the job. After four laps of false attacks and suicidal solobreaks the winning break got away, three Mercy/Specialized teammates, a tapped-out non-pulling hanger on, and Dan. Dan sized them all up, took his pulls and salivated at the thought of the finish.

300 meters to go and EvilDan comes out to play. The finish is an uphill into a strong wind coming from the left. The pace accelerates, Magic Dan sneaks to the front and moves to the right. The skinny-ass climber is alone into the wind and has no chance, right? 200 meters to go and the other three try to come around on the left, instantly providing Crafty Dan the shelter he needs. He takes a breath, regroups and slingshots off the front just as the slope kicks up, taking the win rather handily.

"I got in a break with three time trialists and showed them how to sprint" said Dan. Win he did, and he still has a thumb and a couple of fingers left to count off any lost uphill finishes.

Fancy Dan goes home with a fat wad of cash to wave at the family and is formulating plans for midwest masters domination and dreaming of a trip to Disney World with his winnings.

Call him what you like, but add Winner Dan to the list of epithets.